A Post for College Freshman

Do you have a wonderful son, daughter, niece, nephew or friend heading off to college for the first time? After all that's been invested into them for 18 years, of course you want them to have the best experience ever for the next four years. Along with all the purchases, packing and clothes shopping, a little warning of how to be socially prepared for college life is a great add on to your list of to-do's. Especially for those heading to huge state colleges.

At a recent meeting at my house, 22 year old girl Britni Bersin shared candidly with a group of girls what she wished she'd known before entering college in Oklahoma. Much discussion followed with some great questions and insights from many. I'm just going to give you a touch of what was said and encourage you to forward this to any college freshman (or moms of) that you know!

1. Coming from a small conservative atmosphere, our Britni had an image that "only bad people party". This was busted when she realized awesome super fun really good people party too, which gave way to reconsidering partying may not be so bad after all. So she tried it and has some stories to share now that she wishes she didn't have. Her willingness to share was prompted by trying to save these girls some problems.
2. Mentality of college for the most part = PARTY. Girls may be thinking about guys with a "oooo I wonder what he's thinking" romantic mentality, but there is a 80+% chance that the guys are looking at you just wanting to score and move on. Be aware he's probably not thinking how "cute" your outfit is and what a great person you are. SORRY to the guys who aren't like that, we discussed that there really are good guys out there too, but no girl wants to be scored on and tossed aside. Screen your guys well. This concept can also be reversed obviously.
3. Though many campuses are "dry", there are many ways around it and people will party. And the "rules" are not followed in Co-Ed dorms.
4. The good news Britni gave is that you CAN have a positive experience in all of this. She watched two friends enter college and live a life with the positive public knowledge that "they don't drink or do drugs" but they still had a blast and were popular just being themselves. People respected their stand and confidence.
5. Britni's advice? Know yourself. If you know you're weak, surround yourself with good stronger people. Get involved in activities. If you know who are you, be yourself confidently and don't try to fit in to something you're not.

So lock your doors. Don't put your drink down where it can be messed with. Drive yourself places so you're not stuck somewhere you don't want to be. Don't live in fear, just in awareness. Have a blast and find good people to have good fun with. Study hard.

Lastly, for parents (and I guess college students if they want one more book to read) I highly recommend the book "Unprotected" by Miriam Grossman, M.D. A campus psychiatrist shares many current stories of life on her college campus and how many popular campus trends are hurting our kids. We need to be aware of what's going on, not to be scared, but to just be informed and able to help our kids through possible scenarios should they occur. Stay one step ahead! :)

Trust all that you put into them. And pray.


  1. Love your positive and encouraging stance! Kudos to Britni for sharing her wisdom! Forwarding this post along right now :D

  2. i would love your take on how to talk to your daughter about body image issues. mine is only 5 and was told that she looked "fat in that dress" by another 5 year old girl. she is absolutely at a healthy weight. we talked about it but she still doesn't like to wear that dress. can't believe i'm having to deal with these issues already!

  3. Katie, I have been out of town a week and catching up! Thanks for your comment, and YES I have been thinking about this very subject because it keeps coming up!! So this topic coming soon. Thanks for your input, appreciated so much. Holly


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